


Pieces

by dreamlittleyo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Coda, Episode Related, Episode: s03e16 No Rest for the Wicked, Gen, Grief, Wordcount: 100-1.000, Wordcount: 500-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-16
Updated: 2011-04-16
Packaged: 2017-10-18 04:58:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/185289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamlittleyo/pseuds/dreamlittleyo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam wears Dean's amulet.  (Written after the S3 finale, so AU and completely spoiler free for S4.)<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	Pieces

**Author's Note:**

  * For [marciaelena](https://archiveofourown.org/users/marciaelena/gifts).



It takes three days for Bobby to get through to Sam and convince him it's time to let Dean go. Even if there were something they could do, even if the blackest magics could get Dean's soul back, Sam finally has to admit his brother's body is too much useless mess. Torn right to shreds by a pack of hellhounds and a dozen invisible claws.

The funeral pyre burns tall, but not tall enough. Sam knows it can never be enough as he watches almost everything his brother was burn away to ash.

He holds Dean's amulet in his hand, clenched so tight he's surprised it doesn't turn to dust in his fist. The pointed edges dig into the skin of his palm, and he welcomes the only sensation he's felt in days.

Bobby wants to pay his own respects, but Sam stands alone in the night. This moment is his, and it may be selfish but Sam is goddamn entitled. His face is dry, no tears, because he cried them all away while he held Dean lifeless in his arms.

He stands—barely blinking—until the fire is just smoldering ash, and as he walks away he knots the leather cord of Dean's amulet at the back of his neck.

He hides it from Bobby. The man is still waiting resolute and loyal at the shit motel where Sam ditched him last night. The amulet is warm, metallic weight under his shirt, and Sam can see the glint of quiet fury in Bobby's eyes at being left behind. Just as quickly he sees that Bobby has forgiven him, or at least decided to, and Sam tries to smile. Because Bobby is the closest thing he has to family now.

Awkward hugging and an offer of hospitality that Sam doesn't plan to take up, and they part ways. Bobby for home, Sam for elsewhere. He doesn't tell Bobby his destination, because he doesn't know himself. He'll figure it out when he gets there, and if not he'll just keep driving.

On the difficult nights, when Sam can't ignore how wrong it feels hunting alone, he touches the amulet that hangs unfamiliar around his neck. When everything still feels wrong two spirits and a zombie later, he clutches the amulet in his hand and realizes it doesn't feel unfamiliar anymore.

Over the next eight months he crosses paths with Bobby twice, Ellen once, and he doubts any of those encounters are coincidence. He puts on his strongest smile and hides the amulet from sight every time. It's not until later he realizes why.

 _He_ gave Dean this amulet, and it's as much a part of his brother as the car, the jacket, as Sam himself. It's a piece of Dean that didn't burn on that pyre. Sam is a hunter, born and bred, and he knows spirits. Knows that when they come back, it's always to that piece of themselves that never burned.

Sam realizes only too late that he's waiting for his brother to come back.


End file.
